MEDIA

Tong queried by Committee for Safety of Foreign Exchange Students

Dear Mr. Tong:

With great interest I acquainted myself with your website.

I thought to share our website with you: www.csfes.org, as well as our current press release.

For decades, foreign exchange students have been raped, molested and faced
with every type of extortion one could imagine. This is one of the many
reasons I formed the Committee for Safety of Foreign Exchange Students.

Please let me know if you have any questions or if I may provide you with
additional information.

Sincerely,

Danielle Grijalva, Director
Committee for Safety of Foreign Exchange Students
P.O. Box 6496
Oceanside, CA 92052
_www.csfes.org_ (http://www.csfes.org/)
_DGrijalva@csfes.org_ (mailto:DGrijalva@csfes.org)
760-414-1314
++=++=++=++=

CSFES Shows Headlines about Abuse of Exchange Students in USA

CALIFORNIA -- November 5, 2005 -- Committee for Safety of Foreign Exchange
Students (CSFES), a voluntary organization safeguarding the interests of the
exchange students in the United States, has stepped up its efforts to
enlighten the foreign students of their rights and plug the holes in the system that
have led to abuse of many exchange students at the homes of their host
parents.

'Committee for Safety of Foreign Exchange Students (CSFES) posts Child
Safety Measures. CSFES urges the student exchange community to make available
these safeguards for foreign exchange students," says a CSFES press release.

'For decades, foreign exchange students have had nowhere to turn for
information when they are victimized. This information will empower these teenagers
by providing a victim services helpline, 1-800-394-2255, to victims of any
crime, and will connect the student to a translation service when necessary to
take calls in as many as 180 languages," the press release says.

The news headlines outlining the continuing abuse of foreign exchange
students which prompted the formation of CSFES can be found by visiting
www.csfes.org .

The CSFES website also gives contact details and other useful information
for the exchange students.

Dear Mr. Tong, Thank you for your recent appearance on my show to talk about the Michael Jackson verdict and the troubling situations false accusations of sexual abuse can make.  The Jackson story was too frequently played for laughs but you presented the elements that really mattered. 

Sincerely,
Chris DeBello
Host, ISSUES & IDEAS
WNNJ-FM/AM, WSUS-FM, WHCY-FM
http://www.chrisdebello.com

You are so easy to book, especially with your topic.

Sarah Davis-Murphy
Hot Guest, Inc.
Phone: (208) 552-2752
E-mail: hotradio89sarah@aol.com

Dean Tong in Child Custody Cases:
http://www.talkguests.com/divorce_custody.htm

On January 18, 2005 Dean Tong interviewed celebrity attorney Gloria Allred ( www.gloriaallred.com ) on his show "Nothing But The Truth" on WTMY AM-1280 ( www.wtmy.com ).

June 27, 2004 on radio jock Glenn Sacks' syndicated show His Side (www.hisside.com), Dean Tong debated celebrity attorney Gloria Allred in a Point-Counterpoint One Hour Interview relative to Parental Alienation Syndrome, false accusations of child sexual abuse, and the high-profile Bridget Marks case.

DEAN TONG on MICHAEL JACKSON:
http://www.aimpress.com/deantong.htm

Online Press Kit

Read what Dean Tong has to say about fatherhood, et al, in a new interview with Joyce Dixon of southernscribe.com: www.southernscribe.com/zine/culture/Tong_Dean.htm

DEAN TONG

Dear Producer:

Did you know that you are one phone call from losing your job, your reputation, your freedom and your friends and family?

Even if you do not have children of your own, all it takes is one well intentioned but baseless call to child protective services to destroy your good name. You could be branded a wife beater, a child abuser… or worse: a child molester. Would you know how to clear your good name from such accusations?

Dean Tong, noted author and forensic legal consultant on divorce and custody issues, had it all: a wife, two children and a career. Then, facing a contentious divorce, he found himself confronted by an unsubstantiated complaint by his estranged wife that he had sexually abused his preschool-age daughter. After contesting the charges, he was arrested on a capital felony charge and jailed. He was barred from seeing his children for 14 months pending trial. The charges were later dismissed.

Although Tong was innocent, it took a 10-year battle waged in six different courts to prove it. His quest to vindicate his name cost him $150,000 in attorneys, psychologists, polygraph and psycho-sexual testing. "Proving innocence requires a commitment to the truth," Tong said. "You must be willing to undergo a battery of psychological exams, hire competent counsel and impeach the credibility of your accuser."

Dean Tong is not alone. Each year, more than 3 million cases of suspected child abuse are reported to authorities. Studies by the Child Welfare League and American Enterprise Institute found that 60 to 70 percent of all child-abuse cases are false or unfounded. "Child abuse is the only crime for which police will file a police report without proof of a crime or naming the accuser," Tong said. "If we required the same concern for accuracy in reporting child abuse as other types of crimes, we would see far fewer innocent people falsely persecuted. More important, cases of actual abuse would be given the full attention they deserve and prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law."

As a forensic legal consultant, Tong provides counsel to thousands of parents falsely accused of abuse. "We cannot guarantee justice for children who suffer at the hands of pedophiles and child abusers until we rid the system of false and unfounded allegations of abuse," Tong said. Tong qualifies as an expert in false abuse allegations under Florida Statute Ch. 90.702 and under Federal Rule of Evidence 702. He has also qualified and appeared as an expert witness in West Virginia and Iowa.

Engaging and informative, Tong can discuss:

• Telltale signs that you may be at risk for false accusations of child abuse - take the Tong Test and know your odds
• The one fatal flaw guaranteed to render you helpless when faced with malicious allegations of sexual abuse - and how to fight back
• Why both men and women are at risk for false allegations of abuse during a divorce
• How laws aimed at child protection and no-fault divorce have caused abuse allegations to skyrocket
• Who lies to law enforcement about child abuse - and why
• The best way to confront and refute false allegations of domestic violence and child abuse
• What percentages of women versus men find themselves falsely accused of physical child abuse, neglect, and failure to protect - the answer will surprise you
• How to tell between actual cases and fabricated charges of parental sexual abuse
• Which states allow psychological experts supporting false abuse allegations while refusing to allow experts supporting the innocence of the accused

A guest on numerous national radio and TV programs, including CNN, FOX News, Court TV, The Montel Williams Show and others, Tong has also been quoted in numerous national newspapers and magazines, in addition to authoring three books on divorce and child abuse, including Elusive Innocence, a guidebook for fighting false abuse allegations. He has served as a media consultant for such widely publicized cases as Jon Benet Ramsey, Elian Gonzalez, Michael Jackson and Woody Allen. As the nation’s leading expert on divorce and family issues, Tong has helped parents in all 50 states with custody issues, false allegations of abuse and domestic violence issues.

Dean Tong is now available for print, radio and TV interviews. Please contact him directly to arrange a time for interview.

Best regards,

Lea Conner
Conner Dudley Communications LLC for Dean Tong, Abuse-Excuse.com.

911 INTERVIEWS AVAILABLE! Call anytime 7:30 a.m. to 10 p.m. EST.

Radio biography

Dean Tong is a forensic legal consultant and author of Elusive Innocence: Survival Guide for the Falsely Accused. Dean has helped thousands of people on issues related to divorce and false abuse allegations. He’s here today to tell you how to tell if you are at risk of false abuse allegations, and how to protect yourself if you find yourself falsely accused.

Expanded biography

A noted author and forensic legal consultant on divorce and child custody issues, Dean Tong found himself falsely accused of sexually abusing his preschool-age daughter during a contentious divorce. After contesting the charges, he was arrested on a capital felony charge and jailed. He was barred from seeing his children for 14 months pending trial. The charges were later dismissed.

Since that time, Dean Tong has become the nation’s leading expert on divorce and false abuse allegations. His personal experience and background in research has enabled Dean Tong to advise thousands of parents and others as a forensic legal consultant on family law issues. Dean Tong has lived the life of family man with a wife and children, only to see that life torn apart by untrue allegations that he abused his only daughter. He was thrown in jail, forced to hire attorneys and undergo psychological and polygraph testing, all of which cost him $150,000 and 10 years of his life.

Having seen the seedy underbelly of divorce law, Dean Tong decided to work to reform the system that tore his life apart. Today, Dean Tong has written three books, including Elusive Innocence: Survival Guide for the Falsely Accused. In addition to his writing, Dean Tong serves as a legal consultant and helps men, women and children who are wrongly or maliciously accused of physical or sexual abuse vindicate themselves of the false charges.

His clients include lawyers, parents and childless men and women who seek advice on divorce-related issues. Among the issues on which Dean Tong consults are parental alienation syndrome (PAS), sexual allegations in divorce (SAID), borderline personality disorder, false allegations of spousal abuse and other strategic deceptions employed by former spouses and divorce attorneys to gain an upper hand in legal negotiations.

In all of his work, Dean Tong seeks to use scientific evidence to demonstrate the verifiable innocence of his clients. Dean Tong firmly believes that those guilty of child abuse – as well as those who maliciously bring forth false allegations of abuse -- should be prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law. He will only consult with parties who agree to participate fully in scientifically valid testing to prove their innocence.

Dean Tong has consulted national and regional media on high profile cases including Michael Jackson, Jon Benet Ramsey, Elian Gonzalez and Woody Allen. He has appeared on TV, radio and newspapers including CNN, Court TV and the Boston Globe.

Dean Tong now resides in Tampa, FL, with his second wife. He holds a bachelor’s degree in biology and pre-medicine from Northeastern University and is a master’s candidate in child forensic studies at the university of Portsmouth and Leeds, England.

10 Questions
Dean Tong, forensic legal consultant and author

Dean Tong is a forensic legal consultant and author of Elusive Innocence: Survival Guide for the Falsely Accused. He has helped thousands of people on issues related to divorce and false abuse allegations. Dean Tong is here today to tell you how to tell if you are at risk of false abuse allegations, and how to protect yourself if you find yourself falsely accused.

1. Each year, more than 3 million people are accused of child abuse. Two thirds of those accusations are unfounded. How can a parent protect him or herself from such accusations? Explain to us what factors put a person at risk for false allegations and how you help people vindicate their names.

2. Many people share your concern that law enforcement officers prosecute abusers to the fullest extent of the law. We all want people to protect victims and report abuse. How is it that anonymous reporting laws hinder prosecution of abusers?

3. Many people in our audience have friends and family who have been through contentious divorces. Explain why no-fault divorces have increased the number of false allegations of spousal abuse and false accusations of child abuse.

4. Bad relationships! Who hasn't known someone who was involved with a constantly needy or troubled person? How can a person tell if their partner has more serious issues that might lead to trouble down the road?

5. Explain to us the Tong 2-Prong Test for those accused of physical or sexual child abuse, domestic violence or sexual harassment.

6. In your book Elusive Innocence: Survival Guide for the Falsely Accused, you assert that victims and families of abuse behave differently than those who fabricate such allegations. What are the key characteristics and differences between the real victims of abuse and those who are making up stories?

7. Every day the news has a story about another priest, another coach or another father who has sexually abused a child. The outrage felt by the American public has reached a boiling point. How can we ensure that the guilty go to jail while protecting the innocent from false allegations?

8. Victims of false abuse come to you for help in clearing their names. I understand that you require clients participate in scientific testing to prove their innocence. How do you know that clients aren't just trying to beat the system?

9. You say that social services and law enforcement are biased because they look for information that confirms allegations of abuse or harassment. Your book also states that investigators oftentimes misinterpret or misattribute the statements made by children. Can you tell us what you mean by source misattribution and confirmatory bias and why they are important factors in the explosion of abuse allegations?

10. Every state allows for psychological experts to testify in support of the alleged victim, yet several states don't allow experts to appear in support of the accused party's innocence. Why is that? And how can our listeners find out about the laws in their state?

The Nine Deadly Sins of Divorce

For many years, society viewed adults who divorce as the primary victims of divorce while children suffer only financial loss when their parents divorce. Recent Federally funded studies have shown this is not the case: Children suffer terribly socially, psychologically and economically when their parents divorce. Forensic legal consultant and noted author Dean Tong consults with thousands of parents each year on divorce, custody and child abuse-related issues. He says that children need both parents whenever possible. For those parents who find they cannot stay together, Dean Tong says it's important to keep in mind The Nine Deadly Sins of Divorce that affect both parents and children, and to protect children from their effects:

1. Divorce destroys families It goes without saying that divorce tears apart the fundamental basis for a child's security: the family.

2. Custody battles Fighting over residential time places children in the impossible situation where they are forced to pick sides between parents. Even when parents seek to insulate their children from their divorce, a custody battle can destroy any facade of stability created by the outwardly peaceable relations between their parents.

3. False and unfounded allegations of abuse Even in so-called "no fault" divorce states, parents and relatives of divorcing parties seeking to gain an upper hand in custody and financial arrangements file false or unfounded allegations of domestic violence or child abuse. Once falsely accused, an innocent party oftentimes must spend tens to hundreds of thousands of dollars defending their good name while finding it nearly impossible to remove the stain of abuse allegations. Such allegations also damage the children involved by forcing them to participate unnecessarily in intrusive psychological examinations and courtroom proceedings.

4. Domestic violence The strain of a failing marriage drives many men and women to commit violent acts against those closest to them, their spouses and children. The physical injuries last only a short time compared to the psychological damage caused by parents and spouses who let loose their anger on their families.

5. Parental Alienation Syndrome Hurt and embittered parents frequently poison their children against their former spouses by criticizing them. Parental Alienation Syndrome (PAS) is a clinical diagnosis for the syndrome whereby children come to dislike or show actual contempt for a parent because of statements made by the other parent. PAS is expected to appear in a forthcoming edition of the Diagnostic Statistical Manual of Mental Illness.

6. Parents who create false injuries to attract sympathy (Munchausen's Syndrome) Occasionally, parents suffering from various mental illnesses (including Borderline Personality Disorder) fabricate or create actual injuries to their children in order to draw attention or sympathy.

7. Child abduction Although many states have laws barring parents from relocating, parents sometimes unlawfully relocate or abduct their children in order to avoid sharing residential time with their former spouse. In certain instances, these abductions violate Federal law, prompting involvement by the Federal Bureau of Investigations.

8. Turning Children into Pawns In some divorces, parents come to view their children as pawns to be awarded to the winner as spoils of war. In such cases, the needs of children become secondary to the desire of parents to avenge the perceived wrongs of their former spouse.

9. Parentification of children Parents who find themselves emotionally incapable of dealing with the realities of their divorce sometimes turn to their children to fulfill parental duties. When this occurs, parents expect children to behave as adults, providing a parent's share of household chores or listening to the parent's personal problems or concerns from which a child ought normally to be sheltered.

Stop the Real Abuse

Society rightfully places a high priority on sheltering victims of abuse, offering ample public and private resources for those who wish to report domestic violence, or physical or sexual child abuse. These efforts have, unfortunately, resulted in a dramatic increase in the number of false and unfounded claims of abuse. Each year, forensic legal consultant and author Dean Tong consults with hundreds of parents and attorneys on issues related to divorce and child custody issues. When it comes to divorce and allegations of abuse, Dean Tong says it is important for child welfare advocates to know the most common types of abuse and their chief characteristics.

Victims of Divorce: How innocent children suffer when warring parents divorce Even when parents make every effort to limit their children's exposure to the effects of their divorce, children oftentimes suffer from the loss of an intact household. The symptoms may include any of the following:

• Separation anxiety
  Children of divorce may fear separation from their parent(s).
• Parental Alienation Syndrome (PAS)
  Parents may poison their children against their former spouse by criticizing them and encouraging a child to "pick sides."
• Poor school performance
• Drug experimentation and/or abuse
  Children whose parents divorce are more likely than their peers to experiment with or use drugs.
• Eating disorders
• Criminal activity The largest federally funded longitudinal study of divorce found that children who do not live with their fathers are more likely to commit crimes and face incarceration than their peers from intact homes.
• Teen pregnancy Teens who grow up with absent fathers are more likely to engage in premarital sex and become pregnant than their classmates who have actively engaged fathers.

Each year, law enforcement officials receive more than 3 million reports of physical or sexual child abuse. More than 60 to 70 percent of these complaints turn out to be false or unfounded. In such cases, innocent people find their names tarnished by allegations that they committed the most unspeakable of crimes. Here are some of the reasons behind the unacceptably high rate of false and unfounded reports:

• Anonymous reporting encourages false reports
  Confidential and anonymous reporting allows grudge-bearers and people who lack evidence to file false and unfounded allegations of child abuse.
• Not requiring proof or evidence of abuse encourages false and malicious allegations
• Use of "anatomically correct" dolls with exaggerated attributes
  So-called "anatomically correct dolls" with exaggerated attributes prompt children to make statements that are misconstrued as indicative of abuse. The dolls are not standardized or used by the American Psychological Association. More important, the dolls don't represent actual people in the child's life.
• Source misattribution errors
  Child welfare officials frequently misattribute the source of a child's statement as being indicative of abuse when, in fact, nothing improper has occurred. For example, "daddy" is really a stepfather, a child calls a pencil "pee pee," or a child calls "my belly button" -- which Daddy tickled -- "my bottom." More than 60 percent of all child abuse allegations are due to source misattribution errors.

The Abuse of Errors

Most abuse allegations are unfounded and false. For the past 15 years, author and forensic legal consultant Dean Tong has consulted with thousands of victims of false and unfounded allegations of child abuse. Dean Tong believes that criminals who prey on children should be prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law. He also believes that “society cannot put an end to child abuse until it first eliminates false and unfounded allegations of abuse.” In doing so, Dean Tong says society will allow law enforcement to devote its full resources to “investigating and locking up those who seek to harm our greatest asset: our children. Before we can reform the child welfare system, it is important to understand it.

What the high percentage of untrue abuse allegations mean to society:

1. Innocent people are brought under scrutiny and falsely labeled as abusers

2. Squandered taxpayer dollars spent investigating baseless accusations

3. Children are forced unnecessarily to participate in lengthy and intrusive psychological exams, “therapies” and legal proceedings

How to fix the system:

1. Eliminate anonymous reporting of abuse

2. Require abusers provide evidence of their allegations.

3. Use age-appropriate interview techniques

4. Take steps to limit bias by interviewers who might wish to only seek evidence that confirms a complaint of child abuse

5. Use statistically valid research methods for investigating abuse

6. Create a federally funded task force of well-trained investigators to examine the ever-increasing number of unfounded and false abuse allegations, and to recommend changes in public policy.

ELUSIVE INNOCENCE: SURVIVAL GUIDE FOR THE FALSELY ACCUSED

Expert: Dean Tong

As seen on Montel Williams; Special guest on "Focus on the Family" -- over 1600 TV and radio talk show appearances - Consultant on the Elian Gonzalez case

CONTACT DEAN TONG at:
813.657.4930, Phone/Fax
813-417-5362, Cellular
813-201-0127, National Pager
1-800-854-0735, Interview Hotline

ELUSIVE INNOCENCE: Survival Guide For The Falsely Accused
Publisher: Huntington House
Author: Dean Tong
Pages: 278
ISBN: 1-56384-190-8
For Complimentary Media Copies: Please Call Lily at 1-800-854-0735

DEAN TONG

Author and internationally noted forensic consultant Dean Tong, in his new book, Elusive Innocence, crystallizes for audiences the differences between real and unreal child abuse and domestic violence allegations 60% of all alleged child abuse reports turn out to be unfounded, as source misattribution errors.

Tong's book discusses everything from the SAID (Sexual Allegations In Divorce)and PA (Parental Alienation) Syndromes, to BPD (Borderline Personality Disorder) and the VAWA (Violence Against Women's Act). Tong is not timid in pointing out that many well-meaning system professionals -- lawyers, judges, lawmakers, psychologists, social workers, therapists and medical doctors -- do not know that they do not know.

When laws such as CAPTA, VAWA and No-Fault Divorce are combined with less-than-scrupulous child interview practices such as scripting, guided imagery, stereotype induction, play therapies employing anatomically exaggerated dolls and the use of closed-ended questions, children will say abuse happened, when in fact, it did not. Tong advises parents how to fight back and win. His motto is "Take no prisoners, this is a war."

He is willing to do forum-type TV or radio interviews with others who do not hold his views, including prosecutors, judges, therapists, social workers, psychologists, and what he terms "strident feminists." You may contact Dean Tong at (813) 671-4190 by phone or fax, or page him at (813)278-8356. He is available on short notice as a guest expert interviewee.

Who's telling the truth? [The Tong Test]
STORY ANGLES BACKGROUNDER
INTERVIEW QUESTIONS
BIO

THE TONG TEST:

The TONG TEST is Dean Tong's anecdotal list of red flags that points out whether you could be victimized by a false or unfounded allegation of child abuse in the future! Remember, we are living in Hilary's Village, so if you do NOT think it can happen to you, think again! If you, or a member of your family meet any of the following criteria, you could be the next victim:

• Home Schooling
• Spanking
• Divorce
• Custody
• Visitation Dispute
• Monetary Issues - Child Support, Alimony, or Marital Assets
• Paternity Issues
• If You Have Young Children who are in Pre-School, or Kindergarten
• Adultery, or Affairs
• Doing Drugs
• Personality Disorder, e.g. BPD
• Mandated Reporters - Nurse, Doctor, Social Worker, Teacher, Police Officer, GAL (Guardian-Ad-Litem), CASA (Court Appointed Special Advocate), Psychologist, Therapist, or Counselor, Priest or Pastor, Daycare or Youth Care worker, Boy Scout Leader, et al
• Sports Coaches
• Impose Strict Religious Tenets
• Blended Families
• Loved One in Therapy
• Loved One Affiliated with a Church or Other Religious Institution
• A Sexually Curious Child
• A Child Who Prays in School

STORY ANGLES

1. Story Angle - Are all priests pedophiles?

A national hysteria involving pedophilic priests has gripped America. From RICO (Racketeering Influenced and Corrupt Organizations) lawsuits in Missouri to His Holiness, the Pope via the Vatican chiming in that priests should submit to psychological profiling before entering the priesthood, the Church stands to lose millions of dollars. Interview Dean Tong, author and forensic consultant, who will tell your audience that on one hand the catholic church has been neglectful in reporting actual cases of child molest, but on the other hand collateral damage in the form of false accusations can and probably will occur because *the innocents will be guilty by association*. Media: Call 1-800-299-2668 and receive a complimentary copy of Tong's new book Elusive Innocence, a book that every American priest should be reading right now!

For more information, please visit
www.talion.com/presskits/false-accusation.html

2. Story Angle. Modern Witch Hunts: "Witch hunts" take place daily in America's homes, daycares, schools, hospitals and courtrooms. Like the witchcraft hysteria that destroyed lives in centuries past, modern witch hunts a

BACKGROUNDER

Modern-Day Witch Hunts: A wife's attorney in a no-fault divorce action will often advise her to take the children and leave without warning, then force the husband out of the house with a restraining order falsely charging him with child sexual abuse or domestic violence. This strategy works so strongly in her favor that failure to discuss this option may be considered legal malpractice. It is one reason child molestation allegations have increased 1700 percent since the 1970s, says author Dean Tong.

Statistical references:

www.puaf.umd.edu/faculty/facultystaff/besharov.html
(Dr. Douglas J.Besharov)

ags.uci.edu/~dehill/witchhunt/cases.htm www.vix.com/men/falsereport/child.html

False Charges in Custody Cases:

Damage to the Child -- Traumatic effects of making the child a witness against a parent include:

Disruption of the intact family, for which the child may feel responsible

Changes in temporary custody, living environments and schools Intensive and intrusive investigations of alleged sexual abuse by multiple social service, law enforcement and civil justice system personnel Pressures by one parent to falsely accuse the other parent of serious charges Parental pressure to establish family loyalty by taking sides against the accused spouse Child protection service providers and other professionals, acting under the mistaken belief that abuse occurred, further damage the child's emotional well-being rather than protect it.

Encouraging False Testimony -- When a parent raises accusations that her estranged spouse has sexually abused their child, the law requires investigation by one or more social services caseworkers, medical doctors, child psychologists, and law enforcement agencies, often over a period of months. Part of the investigation typically involves the use of "anatomically detailed" dolls to demonstrate what the accused is supposed to have done.

Anatomically detailed dolls: Studies which compare doll-play behavior of nonabused children with that of children who were abused raise serious questions about the validity of using anatomically detailed dolls for diagnosis. These dolls -- the same kind used in middle-school sex education classes -- can provide a crash sex-ed course to impressionable, way-too-young children. Although familiarity with genitalia and sex acts are usually accepted as evidence that the child was sexually abused, in fact it can show that the child has been coached by experts. Inherent problems with the anatomically detailed dolls are as follows:

They're not standardized for usage by the APA (American Psychological Association)

They're gross disfigurements of the human condition

They don't represent actual persons in a child's life

More about problems with use of anatomically correct dolls:
www.ipt-forensics.com/library/images2.htm

Why would children lie in court, especially against a parent?

Courts are routinely asked to believe that children do not lie, or cannot be mistaken. But in fact, children can be trained to say various things either directly or by subtle teaching through reinforcement such as verbal responses, encouragement, body language and facial expressions. As a general rule, says Dean Tong in "Elusive Innocence," children seek to give the answers they think are desired, rather than deal with facts that may get negative reactions.Every time he or she repeats the story, the child becomes more and more convinced that it is true. Children ages four to seven tend to overgeneralize, they fabricate in an effort to fill in the blanks and soon begin to believe what they have said. Moreover, in his book, Tong claims that while kids may appear to be credible, their disclosures are oft unreliable. Faulty interview techniques Social workers and others involved in child protection often approach an interview with the belief that if the child said it or the mother said that the child said it, then it must be true -- the child has been molested. When asked whether abuse occurred, if the child says "yes" mommy is proud of him or her; Say "no" and the child is asked, "is this one of the yucky secrets? Is this a scary secret? Were you told not to talk about this?" If a child says he was abused, he is telling the truth. If he says he wasn't, he's lying because of denial. Either way, the interviewers become unwitting conspirators with the accusing parent to permanently harm both the child and the accused parent.

More about suggestive child interrogation techniques:
www.tc.umn.edu/under006/Library/Hungary.html

First Aid for False Charges:

When you learn you are being falsely charged with abusing or molesting your child: Retain expert legal counsel.

Anticipate that the worst is yet to come. Consider retaining a consultant to devise a defense strategy to help prove the accused's innocence while impeaching the credibility of the false accusers

Create a timeline or chronology of events and circumstances.

Educate yourself and your legal counsel about current scientific literature in child development, children's suggestibilities, memories and false accusations of abuse.

Ask your attorney to file these motions:

- Motions in limine to exclude any scientific evidence BEFORE it is presented;

- Motions for hearsay relevancy and competency hearings BEFORE hearsay evidence is admitted by the court;

- Motions to suppress unnecessary and deleterious therapy sessions of the alleged incest victim(s);

A request for production of documents, and if necessary a motion to compel, to obtain all discoverable notes, documents and statements that may help your case.

A motion for independent psychological investigation (sometimes called an IME) to have the child evaluated by your expert PhD on video.

Depose all necessary parties who may contradict the accusers' hearsay statements. Take the necessary tests to prove your innocence.

Attorneys who specialize in defense against false allegations of sexual abuse in divorce actions are listed in the appendices to Dean Tong's book, "Elusive Innocence," along with consumer information on how to choose an attorney and case precedents on the issue. Tong also includes web site listings for investigators, psychiatrists, psychologists and full defense teams. Some of these listings can also be found at Tong's web site, www.abuse-excuse.com/links.html

Sexual Allegations In Divorce(SAID)Syndrome:

The SAID Syndrome was first recognized in a 1986 study by Dr. Gordon J. Blush and Karol L. Ross. The study identified six domestic situations that suggest the possibility of false child sexual abuse allegations. They are:

- Evidence of a family on the verge of marital breakup

- Divorce proceedings already in progress

- Divorce proceedings that have been unsuccessfully in progress for some time

- Unresolved visitation or custody problems

- Unresolved money issues related to a divorce in progress

- Involvement of either or both parents in ongoing relationships with others

Blush and Ross observed that several behaviors indicate the possibility of false allegations:

- The allegation surfaces after separation, when legal action for divorce has begun.

- The family has a history of dysfunction, with unresolved divorce conflict.

- The female parent tends to exhibit a hysterical personality pattern.

- The male parent tends to exhibit a passive-dependent personality pattern

- The child is a female, under the age of eight, who shows behavioral patterns of verbal exaggeration, excessive willingness to indict, inappropriate affective responses and inconsistencies.

- The allegation is communicated by the custodial parent, usually the mother.

- The mother takes the child to an "expert" for further examination, assessment or treatment.

According to the Joint Custody Association, Los Angeles, California -- In BONA FIDE SEXUAL ABUSE CASES:

- The mother will generally be upset, secretive and embarrassed.

- The child will be fearful and timid in the presence of the abusing parent.

- The description of abuse will be consistent, real and serious.

- The mother will express remorse for not protecting the child sufficiently and will be willing to consider other explanations.

- The mother will be willing to have the child interviewed without her presence and will be concerned about the impact on the child if the child testifies.

- If the allegations cannot be verified, the mother will be willing to let go of the investigation as long as the child's well-being can be monitored.

In FABRICATED SEXUAL ABUSE CASES:

- The mother has a need to tell the whole world, expressing no shame.

- The child also wants to tell the whole world.

- The child is comfortable in the presence of the accused and may even scream the accusations in the face of the accused parent.

- Descriptions of abuse often have preposterous scenarios

- A mother who is primarily interested in attacking the father will insist on being present when the child is interviewed, and prompt the child.

- The mother will be eager for the child to testify at all costs.

- The mother will shop for other professionals to verify her suspicions

- The mother will involve the child in multiple examinations.

- The mother will demand that the investigatyion continue, regardless of the impact on the child.

www.jointcustody.org (Joint Custody Association)

www.ipt-forensics.com/journal/issues9-.htm-36k (articles on SAID Syndrome by Blush & Ross and others)

Borderline Personality Disorder:

According to Code 301.83 of the Diagnostic & Statistical Manual IV (DSM-IV), universally used by psychiatrists, Borderline Personality Disorder is "A pervasive pattern of instability of interpersonal relationships, self-image and affect, and marked impulsivity beginning by early childhood and present in a variety of contexts, as indicated by at least five (or more) of the following:

- Frantic need to avoid real or imagined abandonment

- A pattern of unstable and intense interpersonal relationships characterized by alternating between extremes of idealization and devaluation (Everything is defined as either good or bad with no shades of gray in between.)

- Identity disturbance: markedly and persistently unstable self-image or sense of self

- Impulsivity in at least two areas that are potentially self-damaging (e.g. binge spending, sexual promiscuity, substance abuse, reckless driving, binge eating)

- Recurrent suicidal ideations, gestures, threats, or self-mutilating behavior

- Affective instability due to a marked reactivity of mood (e.g. intense episodic dysphoria, irritability, or anxiety usually lasting a few hours and rarely more than a few days)

- Chronic feelings of emptiness

- Inappropriate, intense anger or difficulty controlling anger (e.g. frequent displays of temper or recurrent physical fights)

- Stress-related paranoid ideation or severe dissociative symptoms Projection, a common psychological occurrence among BPDs, often results in Parental Alienation, a form of emotional abuse in which the spouse suffering from BPD turns a child against the non-borderline spouse.

This both reinforces the BPD spouse's delusions and encourages the child to make unfounded allegations against the non-borderline spouse--a major cause of false sexual abuse charges in divorce cases. Many borderlines foster false DV (Domestic Violence) charges against their non-borderline significant others, "ex-parte," based on mere statements of fear of threatened harm! Since symptoms of Borderline Personality Disorder can be similar to those associated with other serious disorders such as depression, paranoia, obsessive-compulsive disorder, bipolar disorder, post-traumatic stress disorder, panic attacks, substance abuse and eating disorders, diagnosing the condition depends on observing patterns of behaviors, thinking and relationships over an extended time period, confirmed by psychometric testing.

About Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD):
www.bpdcentral.com/resources.html(resources on Borderline Personality Disorder, including links to related sites)

www.jwoodphd.com/borderline_personality_disorder.htm

www.eddylaw.com/vol2_no1_art4.htm
(article: "How Personality Disorders Drive Family Court Litigation" by attorney William A. Eddy) About Parental Alienation Syndrome (PAS)

millennium.fortunecity.com/sweetvalley/210/pas/pas2.htm
(article by forensic psychologist Deirdre Conway Rand, PhD)

www.robin.no/~dadwatch/pasdir/pasindex.html
(another article by Dr. Rand)

www.vev.ch/en/pas/bw199901.htm#opinion
(Analysis of PAS by California judge Vernon Nakahara)

INTERVIEW QUESTIONS

1. Why has the number of child sexual abuse cases grown so rapidly in the past 25 years?

2. What percentage of child sexual charges in divorce cases are ultimately found to be unfounded?

3. As a matter of legal strategy, why would an estranged wife want to use false sexual abuse charges in a divorce action?

4. But wouldn't the trauma to the child of giving false testimony against a parent be reason enough to make this strategy unthinkable?

5. How are "anatomically detailed" dolls used to bolster false child sex abuse charges?

6. How have child protective laws and no-fault divorce contributed to the increase in child sexual abuse allegations against fathers?

7. What should a man do first when he learns that his estranged wife is charging him with abusing their child?

8. What percentage of true child abuse incidents are perpetrated by the child's mother? By her new boyfriend or other acquaintances?

9. How can mental health experts help courts distinguish between bona fide and fabricated charges of parental sexual abuse?

10. How can tests like the polygraph and the penile plethysmograph help defend against false sexual abuse charges, and how much do they cost?

11. Are there states where testimony by psychological experts supporting the wife's false accusations are admissible, but experts supporting the husband's innocence are not?

12. Even if sexual abuse allegations are ultimately found to be false, what does it cost the falsely accused spouse in terms of money, emotionsand reputation?

13. Is this a "men's issue," or do male litigants in divorce court also make false abuse charges against their spouses?

14. How did you become so vitally interested in this subject that you have devoted your career to helping defend against false abuse charges?

15. How long did it take you to write ELUSIVE INNOCENCE?

AUTHOR BIO

In divorce court, Dean Tong lost his visitation rights because of an unsubstantiated complaint by his estranged wife that he had sexually abused his preschool-age daughter. When he tried to contest the charges, he was arrested on a capital felony charge, jailed and couldn't see either of his kids for 14 months pending trial. Charges against Mr. Tong were dismissed.

Proving his innocence took ten years in six different courts, with eight attorneys, six psychologists, and $150,000 in expenses. He passed a polygraph test as well as psychosexual tests including the penile plethysmography. In the end, he was allowed eight hours a week of unsupervised daytime visitation.

A graduate of Northeastern University in Boston and a Master's candidate in Child Forensic Studies at the Universities of Portsmouth and Leeds, Mr. Tong has served as strategist or expert witness for falsely accused parents and/or those involved in protracted child custody battles in 40 states in scores of active court cases. He is the author of two previous books, "Ashes to Ashes... Families to Dust" and "Don't Blame ME, Daddy," and is working on his memoir tentatively titled A Father's Worst Nightmare: The Dean Tong Story. He has appeared on more than 2000 TV and radio talk shows and has been the subject of numerous articles in the Boston Globe, Washington Times, Fort Lauderdale Sun- Sentinel, et al.

Contact Mr. Tong via e-mail at DeanTong@aol.com
Contact Mr. Tong via e-mail when sending attached files (if you are a client) at TongDean56@gmail.com